@ShittyComedian: I was having sex with this woman for 10 minutes before I realized it was a man, and then for like 20 minutes after.
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@2tickytacky: I remember when "Something's eating up data." meant that guy from Star Trek was deeply troubled.
@TomHanksIsHot: If I ever kill someone I'm dumping the body in a cemetery. Police will find it and be like "oh yeah this makes sense."
@Laser_Cat: Chocolate fountains are so 20th century. This is the future. At my wedding we're having a burrito fountain.