@KKAlThani: I was in a good mood when suddenly twitter went down & I ran over a blind man, tasered a baby, killed a puppy & set myself on fire.
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@LaBaPete: Not everyone understands my laundry method. It's simple. If it's clean, it's on the floor. If it's dirty, it's on the floor over there.
@DirtMcTurd: Just reported a car stolen because the people inside are black and the stick figures on the window were white
@trevso_electric: Trev's antisocial challenge: walk up to the first coworker you see and say, "I'm sorry you feel threatened by my triceps."