@Dawn_M_: I will take your secret to the grave. Unless I'm drunk and revealing it will make me popular.
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@LizHackett: I miss the days before the internet, when you didn't know some person's every awful thought until they died and you cleaned out their attic.
@panmidwest: [My Funeral] "He died doing what he loved… saying 'Cars have to stop for pedestrians,' as he stepped bravely into the crosswalk."
@Tmoney68: I should have known my son was stealing from his road construction job, but every time I came home I guess I just ignored all the signs.