@ElizaBayne: I wish gyms had a "montage" option
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@sixfootcandy: *puts powdered sugar around my nostrils and walks into blind date set up by my mom*
@Overdue_Bills: She was like "wrong hole", so I said "adventurous on the e-harmony profile isn't knitting quilts Velma", long story short I'm still single.
@shutupmikeginn: [my first cutaway on The Bachelorette] I can eat more roses than any of these guys