@trashtastica: I wish I could feed people I don't like to my cat.
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@ibid78: My desires are unconfessional. No wait. Unconditional? Pumpkin sensual? I just had it. Undone sectionals? Unmoustachable? Stunned pistachio?
@DirtyySouthMess: Apparently it's not enough to just show up, you need to be wearing pants as well.
@SharkJelly: "Hey honey" *drags a cigarette* "have you ever" *drinks some scotch* "slept with a guy" *sucks a lollipop* "with three arms?"
@LackOfShame: 16: I hate old people. Me: That's where you and I are different. 16: You like old people?! Me: No, I hate everybody.