@Marlebean: I wish my husband was as concerned with "preheating" me as he is with the oven...
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@NurseSeymour: Heard my ex tell one of his friends I was a stalker. Almost made me mad enough to come out of his closet and give him a piece of my mind.
@Reverend_Scott: [bum holds his hand out] "can I have some change?" change comes from within "thank u. now I'm not poor anymore"
@Barknado69: Amoeba: dad, how was I made? Amoeba Dad: well son, when a man loves himself very much