@primawesome: I wish there was a way to keep in touch with dogs I meet outside of grocery stores.
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@amandajpanda: I am now referring to my parents as numbers like you guys refer to your kids. 72 & 70 are coming to visit, send wine.
@dafloydsta: Genie: Sure about this? Me: C'mon do it Genie: It's your last wis- Me: I WANNA BE RICH Genie: Alakazam! Hi Rich, I'm Genie
@IcyAndSpicy: Saw a tweet about foods to help your sex life. I need sex to help my sex life, not food.