@bridger_w: I wish there was enough room on TV for another show called Judge Judy, but where people just stood around criticizing a woman named Judy.
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@Wine_Honey1: Pro tip: If you smear your lipstick all over your face like the Joker, people won't talk to you.
@HatfieldAnne: I'm no longer allowed to keep my car window open at stop lights because of my genius for accurately describing pedestrians.
@natalayhehoo: If I ever want to hide something from my husband I'd put it in the dishwasher- he'd never look in there