@MensHumor: I wish this was real life...
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JessicaVarsity: If someone doesn't respond to your text within 5 minutes, they obviously don't love you anymore. Probably never did, react accordingly.
@Coops_Bradley: That's a really big gun in your pants. And that's how you get out of a speeding ticket.
@badbanana: The sincerest form of flattery is having a robot from the future sent back in time to kill you. Imitation is a distant second.