@JimmerThatisAll: I would walk barefoot over hot koalas for you.
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@tarashoe: ohgod what if there's some murderer in the backseat of my car while i'm driving alone and they hear me singing this cranberries song off-key
@theshamingofjay: Forgot my Fitbit because it was charging and now it's like I walked for no reason.
@LoveNLunchmeat: Tit for tat is just exchanging one palindrome for another, much dirtier, palindrome.
@Fred_Delicious: "my dad works at Nintendo" "No he doesn't ur such a liar" *Donkey Kong walks in & takes off his hat & coat* "Hey sport, good day at school?"