If bad ads/pop-ups are redirecting you, please take a screenshot and email it to [email protected]. Help us keep the site clean!
@shot_of_cabo: I'd hit that.
- women drivers
@shkeeber: I may not be the sharpest sandwich in the tree, but put my pants on one sleeve at a time just like you.
Do you have any cookies?
@TedBundybitch: When I tell people I don't speak English to get out of a conversation I randomly throw the word hemorrhoid just to bring it home
@DoucheMcBaggus: What doesn't kill you, forces me to reload.
@dafloydsta: *tear runs down cheek
"Why are all these people dead on the inside?"
"Sir, this is a morgue."
@OhNoSheTwitnt: I hate when people say "you always want what you don't have" like that's really insightful and not just explaining the definition of "want."