@maughammom: I'd say 20% of my day is spent trying to convince the dog we're not about to be murdered by the UPS guy, mailman, squirrels, ice dispenser..
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@NYC_Blonde: If I don't wake up with Britney Spears' body circa "I'm a Slave 4 U" and a rich handsome boyfriend then I KNOW Santa's not real.
@DaddyJew: "Get off the phone" "Wash your hands" "Pull up your pants" "Make me dinner" My son runs a pretty tight ship in our household
@Marlebean: They say a dog park is a great place to meet guys. I don't have a dog, but I walk around with a bag full of poop so I don't look weird.