@HeyZeus666: If a baby like Justin Bieber is the face of teen angst and rebellion, then we've bubble wrapped our kids too tight.
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@_davidlucas_: In 2000 years, people will celebrate all this with chocolate eggs delivered by an imaginary rabbit. ~Time travelling me, to Pontius Pilate.
@MableGertrude: I'm not saying you're on twitter too much, but your six-year-old is running an arms trade with the Mexican drug cartel out of his tree fort.
@MattShiney: "The top of my toliet seat is uncomfortable to sit on. I want it to feel like my living room floor" - inventor of carpet toliet seat covers
@illuminatedwndr: I think global warming is real because you hardly see The Penguin on episodes of Batman anymore