@PanicRestroom: If a vampire is also a doctor, an apple is as effective as garlic
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@Shelts99: I may have hit rock bottom, but the upside of being down here, is I can see up all of your skirts. As you were.
@aka_fatman: Dog Morpheus: Ok, Dog Neo. You take the grey pill, you wake up in your kennel. But if you take the GREY pill - I will show you the Matrix.
@bencoffeehall: If peeing was an Olympic event, I would win gold. But then I would miss the awards ceremony because I was taking a leak.
@ThisAlexStein: In order to save money I installed a sound chip into my wallet. Now when it opens it plays a song by Creed so I quickly have to close it.