@SamGrittner: if a woman tells me she just wants be friends I say ok but I get to be rachel
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@Rollinintheseat: I took a "Which Friends character are you?" quiz and I got The Central Perk couch.
@BadassBarbie11: The fact that this peanut butter jar states that it "Contains Peanuts" makes me extremely nervous for the human race.
@SirFlushaLot: "This is wrong on sooo many levels" I say to my victims as I rob them at gun point on elevators.
@felixoshea: If Superman were a realtor, he could describe literally any apartment in the world as 'a stone's throw from the beach'.