@nachosarah: if all my friends jumped off a cliff I wouldn't do it too because cats can land on their feet they'll be fine
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@scottthetwat: The FBI agents that will eventually search your basement won't be able to sleep for a very long time.
@david8hughes: [mattress store] Me: bet u get a lot of losers asking which ones are piss proof huh Clerk: not really Me: what would u recommend to them tho
@icrushedmyhalo: Raise the roof! The roof is on fire! Hit the club! Bust those moves! Burning the dance floor! - RL partying sounds so violent
@TitaniumToplass: use words like 'perpendicular' when you language at people so they think you is good with vocabularying