@lilgapeach30: If an officer asks "do you know why I pulled you over" "Because it's the only way to get girls to talk to you?" is a bad answer, apparently.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@dinnersruined: *hands you a marijuana* "This one's called Air Bud. It'll make you play basketball. Also it might turn you into a golden retriever."
@miffedmim: Ghost: never eats, never sleeps, moans a lot Vampire: sucks the life out of u Werewolf: human w/ fits of howling Child: all of the above
@david8hughes: [doc walks in holding up my X-rays with one hand & giving a thumbs down with the other] Bad news, pal. You're a skeleton.
@theNuzzy: Facebook: Adele is such an inspiration. Instagram: Adele looking beautiful in her gown. Twitter: Adele sounds like a chimney sweeper.