@kumailn: If Billy Joel wrote "We Didn't Start the Fire" today, it would be 2 hours.
@flashember: [Excavation for dino bones]
DIGGER: Sir, we found something BIG!
DOG PALEONTOLOGIST: *tail wags* Ok go for break [salivating] I'll finish up
ME: *wearing 2017 glasses*
OPTOMETRIST: *rubbing his temples* Stephanie your eyesight may be bad but you really only need one pair
@tsm560: The only thing I arouse is suspicion.
@Nocturnesthesia: Neighbor may have just called the cops after hearing me yell at the cat for stealing my cheese bread