@MountainDouche: If cops can drive undercover cars, we should be able to drive cop cars. It's only fair.
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@HeidiCF8: I put my pants on like everyone else... As the cop taps on the glass and shines his high beam in my face.
@ohpegah: ME: On the one hand, I have this weird rash. And on the other hand DATE: ?? ME: It's on both hands, I should probably see a doctor
@Book_Krazy: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over Me: Idk, but could you move this along? I've had too much to drink and I really need to pee.
@Eric_Bader: Got laid twice in two days so either I've done something really good or my wife has done something really bad.