@AGreaterMonster: If cupcakes could talk, boy, there sure would be a lot of screaming in my house.
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@envydatropic: It's cute how I ordered 2 drinks and the bartender asked if I wanted to wait for the other person to be seated
@SarcasticAlly12: Motherhood is like being a fireman putting out fires but everyone is shouting out how you're doing it wrong and criticizing your sweatpants.
@Carbosly: Facebook: I'm happy! Instagram: I'm pretty! Vine: I'm artsy! Pinterest: I'm crafty! Twitter: I'm lying everywhere but here.
@Robert_Beau: At Dairy Queen: Me: Medium Heath Blizzard please. DQ: You wanna spoon? Me: Sure, when do you get off?