@michaeldean0116: If Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader then she would be known as Ella Vader.......
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@nefariousPeterD: Damn, you know you're getting old when you get up in the morning and have to rest for awhile
@_RealBlondeGirl: I hate it when candidates put signs on your lawn without even asking your permission. Who the hell is 'Foreclosure'?
@UncleDuke1969: My daughter, filling out a college app, called me at home to get my home number. Big shout out to the ex-wife for pissing in my gene pool.