@Sadieisonfire: If I answer yes maybe it'll finally come true
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@TjSmooth0: I lost an ibuprofen under my dresser a week ago and now I'm worried the spiders are coming after me with no headaches and renewed vigor.
@omgthatspunny: Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.
@EndhooS: "Come on now, I'm sure that Megatron isn't such a bad guy when you get to know him..." - Optimist Prime.
@squirrel74wkgn: [at work] Carl, did you get naked when you used the bathroom? *standing there with his shirt & pants on backwards* "No...why do you ask?"