@WhrTheBrainRots: If I consider you a friend, I'll be there for you. With an ear, a shoulder, a drill, a shovel, an alibi - whatever you need to feel better.
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@EndhooS: 11 y/o Daughter: [opens xmas present] uh..cable ties? Wife: she asked for a pony.. Me: a pony? ..SHE CAN'T EVEN LOOK AFTER HER CABLES LINDA
@psybermonkey: When my Uncle died the obituary said that he 'passed away in the warmth of his own home.' It was a house fire.
@McNarstle: "He's gone too far." "He crossed the line between science & ethics." "He's playing God." -reaction to the amount of cheese I put in omelets