@robo_junkie: If I could have any superpower, I would pick China.
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@JohnMayer: I understand that t-shirt guns exist but what about shooting pants at people? This seems useful too
@jharden21: teacher: i'm considering moving the test to next week. you guys down with that? me (too loud): down like the dog at the end of marley & me!
@PaperWash: [driver on opposite side of the road puts head lights on] moth driving: omg moth wife: Harold no we have a baby moth baby: FLOOR IT DAD