@IntoxicaTweeted: If I die, tell them to reconstruct me from sock DNA.
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@theshantilly: Why put it in my calendar when I can just wait until someone texts me "Where the hell are you?"
@jordan_stratton: COWORKER: Wanna come to my NYE party?! ME: Aww... I would, but I already have plans. MORGAN FREEMAN: He did not have plans.
@Laser_Cat: The best way to get a job is to hold the other person's hand through the interview. If you don't get hired, no worries. You made a friend.