@Oobrey: If I had any self control I'd probably eat that too.
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@birbigs: One way to tell if what you're watching isn't really news is if the person is shouting at you.
@DurtMcHurtt: Whenever someone mentions rat poison part of me imagines a tiny rodent cover band playing 80s power ballads.
@Reverend_Scott: October 31st, 2187: Sugar is now illegal. Parents search their kid's Halloween bags to make sure the razor blades don't have candy in them.