@Stabby_smurf: If I have written a tweet similar to yours, I apologize for your lack of depth and vision.
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@_ElvishPresley_: Call me old fashioned, but that's not my name and I absolutely will not respond to it.
@dafloydsta: FRIEND: Women like an adventure ME: Okay [later on phone] ME: Are you having fun? DATE: *clearly upset* YOU LEFT ME IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE
@MichaelGoffLA: Pot has never been proven harmful to humans, but the way it makes those huge holes in the street has to give you pause.
@mydmac: *Gets off couch. Goes to Jedi school. Studies for months. *Returns to couch. *Uses the force to get last beer from the fridge.