@_Tempo11: If I put on a latex glove and snap it, that's just me flirting
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@GrantTanaka: When someone asks me how my day is, I like to say "Still kinda pissed about Hiroshima," & then start swearing in Japanese.
@Sanbel11: "Baby, I'm in the bedroom waiting for you" Now I got your attention, let me show you a proper way to make the bed.
@2tickytacky: He told her that trees blossom in her presence. What he meant was that she scares the sap back up into them.
@jwoodham: Guess when toothpaste was invented? 1892. Guess when kissing was invented? A DISGUSTINGLY LONG TIME BEFORE THAT.