@WhatevaConc: If I see you wearing those toe shoes, I will call the police and give them your description every time a crime is reported on the news.
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@AaronFullerton: OK, if you get to refer to your favorite football team as "we," then I definitely get to refer to the cast of Friends as "we."
@fusedude: I found out today that if I just let go of the steering wheel, my car will drive itself. The catch is: my car is a terrible driver.
@scott_towel: Detective: Did your husband have any enemies, ma'am? Wife: Well, the cat next door never really liked Jim, and that always seemed a bit odd.