@bridger_w: If I were a mob boss, I'd ask my henchmen to meet me down by the docks, then surprise them with a day of water skiing
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@huntigula: *Hamburglar returns home with bag of hamburgers* *his wife, holding a crying baby, slaps the bag out of his hands* "WE NEED MONEY, DAMMIT!"
@vladchoc: Why should I have to take a first aid course? Why is this on me? Why don't you take a "how to eat sandwiches without choking" course?
@Book_Krazy: * Kindergarten* Hi kids! I'm the homeroom mom for your class. [writes name on chalkboard] [Boy Raises hand] We can't read. No one can read