@skylerhanrath: If you want a medical degree, they're literally hanging on doctor's walls. Grab one.

@JosesLovesYou: For a hero, it's pretty cool that Mario is just a dude who ignores his real job, does mushrooms and smashes his head into things all day.

@PowKapowBoom: My cat is stuck in a Cheeto bag and I'm really pissed that I didn't think of that first.

@realHamOnWry: Mrs.Potato seemed genuinely upset that her husband was missing, but the smell of French fries in her kitchen made the detectives suspicious.

@murrman5: [me adjusting paintball mask] it's too bad we aren't on the same team date: yeah