@SirEviscerate: If Kellyanne Conway is right and microwaves spy on us, the CIA has a hell of a lot of data on me reheating coffee then forgetting about it.
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@KentWGraham: You act like no one at work has ever asked you to apply ointment to a bunion before.
@BuckyIsotope: Jack and Jill went up the hill To fetch an ounce of ganja Jack lit up and took a puff And Jill cuffed him. She was DEA. Jack died in prison.
@sirivan: Everyone makes fun of Aquaman, but he’s got it all figured out. He spends all day chilling in the water. His life is one big pool party.
@EyesOfGreen73: PSA: If you have kids, do not label the box of your ...ahem.. special items "Toys". It's very awkward to explain.