@PowKaPowBoom: If looks could kill, I'd still use a baseball bat.
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@fillthevacuum: Doggy day care is like a regular day care except you have to enter from the rear.
@bornmiserable: "Where do escalators come from?" "Well, when an Escalade and an alligator love each other very much..."
@Jessdaisy: Being in your 40's is playing a constant game of, why does this hurt? Is the color of this ok? Where did this hair come from?