@Phook75: If love at first sight was really a thing, I would've been married to Cheetara from Thundercats
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@meganamram: If video games have taught me anything, it's that you'll automatically get promoted if you kill your boss
@JessObsess: [Starbucks] What can I get you? I'll have a large coffee, black "You don't have to say black" I'll have a large coffee, African American
@nbadag: 10YO: [on her ipad] beat my high score! ME: y'know they're just numbers on a screen right? they don't mean anything [checks follower count]
@PajamaStew: "Welcome to the future. Let me show you around. Here's the bathroom. This is a robot that we invented that screams at your wet hands."