@Phook75: If love at first sight was really a thing, I would've been married to Cheetara from Thundercats
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@JermHimselfish: Ordered a pizza. Delivery guy and I talked for 45 minutes about swords and he got fired. Now he lives here, we're gonna fight crime together
@AlexvanBeek: [10mins from now] ..& just like that North Korea was removed from history & got nuked by every country on Earth for bringing down Twitter..
@putyoursisterd1: Before we get too excited about rising follower counts, it's good to remember that people also stop to look at accidents.
@better_off_dad: Life is like a Rubik's Cube It may look like a jumbled mess at first, but in the end it will make you want to beat the shit out of someone.