@AnkCoupleTO: If my mom had just faked having a headache I wouldn't be writing this bullshit on the internet right now
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@PortRooster: Buddy of mine dropped some acid... Burnt a hole in the floor... He was tripping for days!
@Cyd10e: 9 year-old attempts to follow a recipe: "It says here to separate the eggs. How far apart do they have to be?"
@CastAwayKristen: NO I didn't eat a whole box of Girl Scout Cookies. I just ate all the cookies inside it.
@rockymomax: [having sex] Her: HARDER! ME: Divide 110 into two parts so that one will be 150% of the other. What are the 2 numbers? Her: 44&66 HARDER!