@jdforshort: If sexual frustration could be transferred into a usable energy source, I would be sitting on a gold mine
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@mooturkey: I used a fax machine today!! I also ran all the cotton thru the gin and plowed the field with my oxen while it finished dialing up.
@SteelFontana: I'm always creeped out by the guy who seems to know the age of consent laws a little too well.
@birbigs: At jury duty they said, "You do not have to be fluent in English." So what you're supposed to do is just guess if the guy is innocent.