@JessicaVarsity: If someone doesn't respond to your text within 5 minutes, they obviously don't love you anymore. Probably never did, react accordingly.
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@robdelaney: Peter Jackson just found a postcard JRR Tolkien wrote his nephew in 1938. He's turning it into 22 nine-hour films.
@Shock_Monster: If life had a 'CTRL + ALT + DEL' option, you bet your ass I'd be hitting that thing about 14 times a day.
@aveuaskew: My dad only says I love you on special occasions like birthdays, holidays, and competency hearings.
@JasonLight73: Duck you AutoCorrect! You Blimb! I'm way more BadApps than you make me out to be! You Ducking piece of shed..BuckFace Toothless Bastilleday!