@QuickandSisi: If someone knocks on your door, knock back from the other side. That someone will go away. It works. Trust me, I just tried it this morning.
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@BradBroaddus: Our mailman freaked out when he accidentally saw me naked. So did all the other people at the post office.
@AimeeHelene1: I vacuumed up a huge spiderweb & then heard a thump in the workout room. The spiders are lifting weights before they attack me aren't they?
@bea_ker:  Dad, Mum, this is my girlfriend. You might recognise her, she used to be quite famous *the laugh-cry emoji steps forward shyly*
@sadvil: Mark Zuckerberg running for office is a terr… [Mark appears in window holding transcript of any of my convos with a girl in 2009] …ific idea