@beckyiniowa: If the head of CIA can't even hide his own affair it's pretty safe to say there were no aliens at Roswell and we really went to the moon.
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@trevso_electric: Jennifer Aniston is always cast in the same role because she's a victim of Rachel profiling.
@bridger_w: When I see a "How am I driving?" sticker, I want to take the driver in my arms and tell them that I too have questions about my existence
@Eightinchgoat: I always carry a knife hidden in my boot, but it’s just to spread cream cheese on the bagel that’s hidden in my other boot.
@wesjohnson8: When you are arguing with an idiot, make sure the other person isn't doing the same thing.