@WoodyLuvsCoffee: If there's a "Mr." in front of your cat's name you're going to die alone.
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@4ndBest: Girl dog: I'm into bad boys Guy dog: [remembering his owner saying how much of a good boy he is] ..oh
@causticbob: A boy asks his mom, "Why am I black and you're white?" She says, "Don't even go there. The way that party went, you're lucky you don't bark"
@buhsbaby_baby: As a grown woman with no children or morals to slow me down, I will have a definite advantage during tomorrow's family Easter egg hunts.
@duplicitron: What if firemen acted like policemen and just drove around shooting water at anyone who looked like they might catch on fire.