@littlekitnerboy: If there's one thing that Twitter has taught me its that all the weird kids in school eventually find each other.
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@girlontapas: I have to go stand in line at Gamestop now because I had a careless night of unprotected sex 13 years ago and Halo 5 is out today.
@RidiculousSheri: I'd like to say I have a yoga body, but it's really more of a Yoda body. Resist all the cheese, I can't.
@salamingia: Don't you love it when you order salt at McDonald's and you accidentally get some fries!
@Kobykincaid: One of the first things they tell you in AA is to stop hanging around alcoholics. So I listened, and never went back.