@AimeeHelene1: If this paper cut is any indication of my pain threshold, then child birth would definitely kill me.
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@VestaTot: My coworker just took a broom and pole vaulted over the cubicle partition to confront the woman who accused her of being on speed.
@SgtButtCheeks: I once knew a brother so smooth he wore a bluetooth in each ear and held the exact same conversation with 2 separate women at the same time
@Maui_Speaks: Dear person who just turned in your resume with no name or phone number. You didn't get the job.
@SkunkFarts: There's a girl that I hate in my office that's white but looks like 'Precious'. I've been calling her "Pressure" & blaming my farts on her.