@AimeeHelene1: If this paper cut is any indication of my pain threshold, then child birth would definitely kill me.
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@chuchugoogoo: idk about you but I still remember what I was doing when I found out Kennedy had been shot: sitting at home, reading the JFK Wikipedia page
@Tmoney68: [Corporate Olive Garden meeting, 1985] Jesus: Let's do unlimited breadsticks. CEO: How can we supply that many? Jesus: *winks at camera*
@man_spach: My favorite Skrillex song is the one where he drops a spoon into the garbage disposal and steps on a cat's tail.