@fuzzlime: If tomatoes are a fruit, then ketchup is a smoothie.
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@bdbdleeroybrown: Tampon commercials create an unrealistic expectation of how much fun it is to be around menstruating women.
@FatherWithTwins: Me: What do you want for breakfast? 4yo: Bagel Me: *makes it 4yo: Tricked you! I wanted toast Me: Nice trick. Now, eat your bagel
@BuckyIsotope: The rest of the Justice League always makes Aquaman eat at Long John Silvers so they can watch him cry.