@beefman138: If Twitter allowed us to attach a signature to each Tweet, mine would be : "He said, stupidly."
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@suzieQ0007: At a wedding where the minister told everyone to stand next to the person who makes life worth living. The bartender was almost trampled.
@djdarrellripley: Hello, I dinged your car. The people watching me leave this note probably think I'm leaving you my name & number. Signed, Guess Who.
@SmartassChef: Nothing freaks me out like when I'm ordering from a Chinese restaurant and I ask "What kind of meat is that?" and they answer "yes"