@BadassBarbie11: If you blow out the kid's Birthday candles at enough parties, people will just stop inviting you to them.
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@jimmytorosian: Me: Have a taste of your own medicine *I force the pills the Dr. prescribed for me down his throat* Me: WHO HAS ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION NOW?!
@TrueTorontoGirl: Cop: Will I find any drugs in your car? Me: I don't know but if you do, I'm not sharing.
@laurenmacdonald: I use the phrase "when I win the lottery" a lot for someone who never buys any lottery tickets.