@careworn: If you don't want me to sing at your kids then don't name them Roxanne.
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@SamDeLanche: We only speak to our two year old with a British accent. She's going to be the coolest kindergartner in Kansas.
@iLikeCatShirts: Therapist: please tell me a little about what brought you both here today. Wife: We don't talk. Plus he is so literal. Me: My truck.
@JeannieG40: Relationship status: Sitting in Home Depot parking lot, car hood open, and asking men if they can jump me.