@bibbymoynihan: If you ever see me in a restaurant, please approach my table and do your Drunk Uncle impression. Especially if I'm with family or a girl.
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@ShaunRightNow: I'll always remember the day my wife said "yes" to my proposal. And I'll never forget that it was the last thing we ever agreed on.
@michaelianblack: Ted Cruz thinks: 1. Presidents should pray every day 2. More prayers the better 3. Muslims pray 5x day 4. Ted Cruz wants a Muslim president.
@amishschool: My doctor said I can get back to my college weight if I simply go for a brisk three hundred mile walk each morning.