@bibbymoynihan: If you ever see me in a restaurant, please approach my table and do your Drunk Uncle impression. Especially if I'm with family or a girl.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Amusitr0n: Sign says World's Largest Ravioli. "Where's the filling?" people ask exploring its vast interior. The sound of boiling water grows to a roar
@shawnspree: Smile and the world smiles with you. Laugh and the world wants you to stop looking at your phone and drive.
@jazmasta: They laughed at me when I bought Velcro sneakers but no one will be laughing when the great shoelace drought of 2044 comes
@Donna_McCoy: My new table from Ikea is actually just the unopened box with a tablecloth thrown over it.