@grimpossible: If you fall down in public the best thing to do is stay down, use your fingernails to dig your way to another country then start a new life.
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@shivillex: Few things in life are more pleasurable than turning off the lights in a public bathroom while people are still inside..
@AlexTHoffman: Little known fact: Scotland is just an elaborate hoax with Mike Myers playing all of its citizens.
@DraggingFeeties: "Your meal is being prepared and should be delivered in 30-45 minutes" Perfect. Just enough time to eat a sleeve of Oreos.