@stacetoned: If you feel like someone is playing mind games with you, they totally are and you should kill them before they kill you.
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@jenstatsky: The best answer to an American Apparel salesperson asking you if you're looking for anything specific is, "the bottom half of a shirt."
@ruinedpicnic: parent: why did you do this to my child willy wonka: well you see they tried to eat some chocolate on a tour of a chocolate factory they won
@2tickytacky: Got my inhaler mixed up with my psychedelic frog and went on one hell of a wheezy ride.