@briangaar: If you pull a lizard's tail off, it will grow back. If you pull it off again, the lizard will be like "dude."
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@audipenny: Sometimes I accidentally make eye contact with someone and it's like "well I better just go with it" and I begin sprinting at them
@david8hughes: [shipwreck diary] Day 32: a plane flew over last night but I fired the only flare on day 5 to celebrate my first solid shit in over a week
@papasuncle: Me: Goodnight moon Moon: night. Me: What? Moon: nothing. It's fine. Me: You're acting distant Moon: I'm 238,900 miles away